A Spa Story
by Queen
Summary: A Separatist spy has infiltrated Coruscant! Unfortunately for the brave troopers of the 501st, the spy has set up shop at a ritzy spa, a place no clone has gone before. How will they ever survive such a posh field of battle? Co-written, with the epilogue by reulte!
1. The Mission Part 1, by LongLiveTheClones

**Author's Note**: Hello all! Queen here, for the moment. Welcome to another co-authored story! Each ficlet in this collection is the result of a story challenge. So though they all share the same theme, they're all a little different from each other.

Each ficlet is written by a different author. Check under the individual ficlet title to see which _Star Wars: The Clone Wars_ author wrote that particular story.

The challenge was: _Write a short story where there is a Separatist spy hiding in an upscale spa. The clones have to find the spy while receiving a spa treatment_.

Enjoy!

~Queen

* * *

_A Spa Story_

* * *

The Mission

(_by: LongLiveTheClones_)

* * *

"Rex, are you clear on the assignment?" Anakin asked as the two walked down the halls of the _Resolute_.

"Infiltrate the Fobosi Elite Day Spa. Find the Separatist spy. Yes, sir," Rex nodded.

"Ahsoka, will be going with you as your backup. It's essential we identify this traitor."

"Understood, sir. I won't let you down."

"Good man, Rex. I know I can always count on you." Anakin nodded to the 501st Captain, and headed in the opposite direction down the corridor.

Rex headed into the hangar of the _Resolute_, where Ahsoka was waiting dressed in civilian garb.

"Ready, Commander?" he asked.

"Uh… gah… yes, Rex," she finally stammered out.

She was staring at…his trousers. When Fives had loaned him the tight-fitting blue pants, he'd assured him these were common civilian garb. Rex found the pants to be a bit odd, as they were almost tight like a bodysuit yet not quite as flexible. He wore them with a flowing white shirt.

"Is this appropriate?" he finally asked.

"Oh, it's _perfect_," the padawan said, in a voice not quite her own, refusing to meet his eyes.

_Odd._

But, Rex just gave a confident shrug and led the way toward the shuttle that would take them down to Corrie.

* * *

All confidence fled when they entered the Fobosi Elite Day Spa. As he gaped around at the unclad, well-oiled bodies of various species around the facility, all color fled from his face.

"No," he said, immediately, backing up toward the exit.

Ahsoka grabbed him by his broad shoulders, and shoved him back in.

"Mind on the mission, soldier," she hissed in his ear.

He turned toward her to voice his stringent objections, but before he could get any further, an overly cheerful Duros swept forward "How are we today, good citizens?"

"Just leaving," grumbled Rex.

"Checking in," corrected Ahsoka, "Full nails for me. Body works for the gentleman."

"Oh, the body works. Mmmmm…. " the Duros' eyes roved up and down Rex's form with a flirtatious eye. "Come come… if you'll just step into this booth and remove all your attire."

* * *

Ahsoka tried not to stare when Rex emerged in just a towel. Perhaps on a smaller man it might have covered more.

But, the 501st Captain was a large man and despite his efforts to stretch the thin pale almost transparent covering over his hips, it just didn't see to want to fit. He stared up at her helplessly, his eyes so wide and pleading that it took all of Ahsoka's self-control not to burst out laughing. So, instead she gave him her most encouraging smile.

The padawan decided right then that this was the best assignment ever.

* * *

"Ah, could I be re-seated? Closer to where the gentlemen are getting their day treatments?" Ahsoka could see that her nail specialist was about to protest, so she quickly dug into the funds provided by Master. "My… uh… partner gets nervous if we are too far apart," she quickly explained, gesturing toward where Rex was just getting settled by his 'Body Relaxation & Oiling Specialist.'

"Of course. We are here to please," her hostess' attitude immediately changed as she pocketed a generous handful of credits. She bowed, and gestured to Ahsoka, moving her to a prime position near the men's area.

The 501st Captain was face down, and she heard his squawk of protest as his towel was quickly ripped away with a flourish. She put a hand over her lips to keep from exclaiming outloud as she caught sight of a pair of perfectly rounded, muscular golden brown buttocks.

_Force. And, I thought THAT looked good in armor_, Ahsoka suddenly found it difficult to breathe. _Seems a crime against the Republic now to keep it covered up._

"You're very tense, sir. Try to relax," coached Rex's Oiling Specialist.

"I _am_ relaxed," grumbled Rex. Suddenly, his head cocked up and he looked across the spa on high alert. He immediately met Ahsoka's eyes.

The padawan realized he'd known she was there all along. He gestured with his eyes toward a Trandoshan at a far back table slipping a data chip to one of the employees as the reptile spoke to another in a low urgent voice. She was amazed Rex had been able to pick up on their conversation, but then again he had impressed her many times with his keen clone hearing. And, unlike her, Rex seemed to have kept his mind on the mission.

His eyes asked Ahsoka the question, 'Do we have a go?'

She nodded, and he burst up from the table, causing a shriek of alarm from his Oiling Specialist. He crossed the day spa in quick, ground-eating strides and threw his body on top of the startled Trandoshan. The two fell to the floor struggling, and the Captain's slightly oiled body slid off the reptile as he tried to pin him.

Rex cried out as the reptiles' vicious claws raked across the vulnerable skin of his naked and unprotected back. Rex emitted a deep feral growl and pulled back his muscular arm, swiftly striking the creature in the jaw and head with several perfectly timed and executed blows. Then, Rex flipped the Trandoshan onto his back and pinned him down with his knee to the middle of the creatures' spine.

"Commander, binders," Rex said, breathily heavily, reaching a hand back toward Ahsoka.

Ahsoka slid a hand into the attractive leather purse she'd borrowed from Padme and withdrew stun-cuffs. Rex easily slapped them onto the Trandoshan, and double-checked they were secure.

"In the name of the Galactic Republic, you are under arrest," Rex said, as he knelt over his cornered quarry, his chest still heaving.

Ahsoka tried not to stare at how primal Rex looked in that moment as his well-oiled and completely naked body hovered above his defeated prey, still dripping blood from the scratches on his back.

She reached a hand up and gently touched his back. "We should probably get a little bacta on that."

He started at her touch, and stared at her wide-eyed. He shook his head. "No."

A crowd from the spa had gathered around them at the excitement, and somebody pressed a medkit into Ahsoka's hands. "Thank you," she said. Then looked around the gathered crowd. She scowled, and closed her eyes focusing her thoughts, "There's nothing to see here. You all want to go about your business."

The crowd immediately dispersed and resumed their activities, ignoring them completely now.

"That's handy," Rex admitted, grudgingly.

The Trandoshan stirred slightly, and Rex slugged him hard again in the head.

"_Stay_," he said, firmly. He shook his hand a bit as if working the sting out. "That's easier with gauntlets on," he commented.

"I don't know, Rexster," Ahsoka said with a smile, opening up the medkit and perusing the contents. She moved behind him and found a sterilizing spray. "You were rather magnificent even without your armor."

Rex didn't flinch or react at all as she treated the long scratches. Ahsoka had to admit that perhaps she might have taken a bit longer than necessary, lingering over the honey-brown skin of his back.

"Are you done, Commander?" Rex prompted, looking over his shoulder. "We need to call for pick-up." He scowled, "I'd like to… get into more appropriate kit."

"Yes," Ahsoka said, trying to keep the tone of regret out of her voice.

_Force. The best assignment ever was coming to an end._

She stared down at the unconscious Trandoshan spy. Maybe while Rex was changing she could let him go? They could catch him all over again….

She shook her head at her thoughts and then just sighed again.

_Well, I'll always have the memories. Two perfect globes. Force, Rex. I'll never be able to walk behind you again. What were the Kaminoans thinking when they created such a genetically perfectly as-_

"Ready, Commander?"

Ahsoka started at Rex's voice. He was fast.

"Ah, yes, of course."

The 501st Captain quirked up an eyebrow, and gave the Jedi a puzzled look. "Just what were you thinking about?"

"The mission, Rex. Always the mission. Let's go."


	2. The Mission Part 2, by LongLiveTheClones

_A Spa Story_

* * *

The Mission: Part Two

(_by: LongLiveTheClones_)

* * *

Rex returned from his day at the Fobosi Elite Day Spa. He was glad he had accomplished his mission objective. But, he was not sure he understood what the fuss was over this whole 'spa' business. He did not find the whole experience relaxing, at all. Now, giving his decee a good cleaning, _that_ was relaxing.

Since they were going to be on Corrie for a few days while the Jedi interviewed the captured spy, the clones were now down on the planetside barracks. Rex didn't mind as the barracks were roomier and had a much large rec area than the one aboard the ship. It was in this area that most of the Legion was now gathered enjoying the precious time off. But, the majority of them seemed to be clustered about one corner all staring intently at… something.

"How many hits has it gotten?"

Rex immediately recognized Tup's voice. To an outsider, all clone voices might sound the same, but to another brother, each was distinct.

"This thing has gone _viral_."

Fives.

Rex should have known. If there was mayhem in the barracks, Fives was always in the center of it. The ARC was currently on assignment with the 501st and while his skillset may have broadened due to his additional training, his impish nature remained well-intact.

"Most popular vid on HoloTube right now. By far."

Fives voice held the tone of somebody who was both greatly amused, but also somewhat proud at the same time.

Just what in the nine hells of Corellia were they talking about?

He stood behind the group of troopers, hands on hips, and cleared his throat loudly. The group turned around, clearly startled, and many of them crisply saluted automatically out of habit coming to stand at rigid attention. Fives, to his credit, did neither of these things, but he did turn uncharacteristically red and attempt to stash a datapad down his pants.

"_Fives_," Rex pointed with annoyance at the huge rectangular bulge now jutting out from the front of the ARC's fatigue bottoms. "I believe that's for me." He stuck out his hand expectantly.

The ARC looked hesitant, and the Captain stared him down with his most intimidating look. "If I need to, Fives, I'll dig it out myself. But, trust me, I won't be gentle."

Fives sighed, and slid a hand down his pants and tugged out the datapad. "Fine. You'd probably have found out eventually anyway." He slapped the screen into Rex's outstretched hand. "It's queued up. Just watch the one entitled: 'Naked hero takes down baddie in Fobosi Elite Day Spa.' Click on the bottom right if you want to get the most recent traffic stats. We've been watching the numbers. It's been number one since early this afternoon, ever since it went viral."

Rex felt a cold feeling of dread settle in the pit of his stomach, even as he tried to follow Fives' words. He never watched the HoloTube, even though he knew Fives and some of the other troopers were fascinated by some of the ridiculous civilian content posted there. He tolerated this habit, knowing that for many of them it was as close as they would get to actually experiencing civilian life, even though he saw no practical use for posting vids of singing Mutts.

A squeaky voiceover came on over a black screen: "I was just getting my weekly Herbal Muja Fruit Limo Slimming Scrub when all of a sudden this bronzed god comes running across the spa and he just like tackles this guy, who I kind of later on figured must be a bad guy or something. But, whatever, who cares right? The important thing is you just have to see this guy? Like oh my nine stars of Corellia wait until you see this guy! Not only is he gorgeous, but he has got the biggest… muscles. I mean, big. I am in looooovveee. So, honey, whoever you are. Send me a vid, OK? We gotta' get together. You, me and those muscles of yours. Love you! OK, check out the video."

Then, a shaky video shot, likely from the camera of a handheld comm, showing first just shouts and confusion, and then focused on Rex sprinting across the spa. The camera work steadied out and focused a bit better just in time to be able to see the 501st Captain taking down the Trandoshan. There were some fairly good shots of Rex punching again and again and then turning to speak to Ahsoka. Then, the Jedi turning to address the crowd and suddenly the video ends.

As the clip ended, Rex just stared at the datapad speechless. He noticed everyone in the rec room was just watching him, waiting for a reaction.

To everyone's surprise, the 501st Captain tossed back his head and started laughing.

Fives glanced at Rex, "You're… not upset?"

Rex shrugged, "I'm a clone. For all anyone knows, that could have been _any _one of you there. This is one of the few times that there's a huge advantage in having several million guys that look just like you. I accomplished my mission. That's all I care about in the end."

Fives quirked up an eyebrow, half-teasing, "So… you're not going to call this woman?"

"No," Rex said, firmly. "And, I'll probably armor up when I go out in public until we ship out again just to be on the safe side. I'll let the rest of you take the heat if you choose to be walking around in your fatigues."

The rest of the brothers in the Legion just glanced back at each other, suddenly unsure of themselves, not sure how to take this new development. Rex's eyes glinted with amusement. He decided to armor up and go find Ahsoka to see if she'd find this as amusing as he did.

As he was leaving the rec room, Fives caught up with him and slung an arm around his shoulders. "Can I have my datapad back? You can use your own you know. It's easy to find on the holonet. You are number one right now."

Rex slid the datapad off his belt and handed it back to Fives, "Fine. Here you go. Enjoy."

As he continued walking toward his quarters, the ARC kept following him.

"Something else you wanted Fives?"

"Uh," Fives hesitated just a moment and then blurted out, "since you're not planning on calling that woman, "do you mind if I give it a go?"


	3. Clear as Mud, by Spikala

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Clear as Mud

(_by: spikala_)

* * *

ARC trooper Echo was decidedly uncomfortable about the whole situation. Nothing in the reg manual even remotely covered anything like… this.

He lifted an arm out of the smelly grey goop and sighed as gobs of mud dripped off his arm and plopped into the surface of the tub. Two tubs over, his target was still lolling around in his own tub, a small white towel draped loosely over his face. It was just the two of them. Oh, them and the over-eager male attendant who for some reason had been very keen to help Echo remove his body suit and seemed to have a nervous twitch, his eyes wandering all the time he was helping Echo disrobe.

Echo sighed. This was more Fives cup of caf than his, sneaking around a spa to try and track down a Separatist mole. Intel said that this spa was used as a dead drop for a Separatist cell in the area. At the moment, all Echo could see was a large naked man fermenting in smelly mud. This was the problem with hesitating when the assignments were given out - you got stuck in the men's section of the spa.

As far as décor went, he had to admit he was impressed by the efficiency of the place, even if tiling a mud room in white wasn't perhaps the smartest thing to do. Every fixture and fitting had a purpose. Echo nodded slightly to himself. That was good.

There was a squelching sound as his target got up, his large bottom wobbling obscenely as he hauled himself over the lip of the tub. Echo winced. He'd never understood why civilians went to such extremes to avoid exercise. The attendant, a man who was as leanly muscled as the clones, was there instantly with a white towel, but Echo noticed that his earlier twitching seemed to have calmed down somewhat, his eyes were riveted to the large man's face.

His target was heading for the shower. Echo had to follow. He started raising himself out of the muck and the attendant was suddenly right by his elbow with a speed and stealth that would've done credit to any of the five oh first.

"Is sir done already?" the attendant asked breathily.

"Er, yes, thank you." Echo wasn't used to civilians calling him sir and deferring to him, but he squelched his discomfort.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we seem to have run out of towels. I hope sir does not mind walking to the shower au naturel," the attendant said.

Echo's brows furrowed slightly. He had caught a glimpse of the storage unit where the attendant had retrieved a towel for the fat man and he was fairly sure it was well stocked. The attendant was suffering another spasm of wandering eye, poor man, and was clearly waiting for a reply from him.

"That's okay," Echo said.

The attendant took his arm firmly to help pull him out, wrapping an arm around Echo's waist to keep him from slipping on the muddy tiles. It was all terribly helpful, but the attendant was getting as covered in muck as Echo. They would both need a shower after this.

The fat man was exiting the room. Echo's internal alarms started jangling. He _had_ to follow, but he was still covered in mud, unable to move to the next room until he was clean. He supressed a growl of frustration. The attendant was being very helpful though, painstakingly cleaning off every scrap of mud with a wonderfully soft loofah and seemed very interested in getting the mud off his torso and buttocks.

Echo decided there and then, he was not going to mention this mission to Fives. Ever.


	4. Commander Wolffe Gets a Pedicure, laloga

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Commander Wolffe Gets a Pedicure (And Likes It)

(_by: laloga_)

* * *

Wolffe scowled at the young Zeltron woman seated before him, nail file in hand. "Absolutely not."

"But-"

Huge, violet eyes blinked at him, but his scowl deepened. "No..._polish_, of any kind. And I mean it."

Bad enough he had to come along on this _shabla_, foolish mission when there was a War to win; bad enough that he'd been forced to leave his armor and weapons in the locker room and wear only a white, fluffy robe, but he was under _no_ circumstances having anyone, even a pink-skinned, buxom Zeltron female paint his kriffing toenails. She'd already spent far too long clipping and buffing and Force-knows what else, and the very idea of _paint _on his _toenails _was enough to make his toes curl in the basin of hot water that was resting before the padded chair in which he was seated.

Okay, the basin felt...nice, actually. Several jets were streaming hot water across his feet, which were – for once – not sore in the least, and before she'd started the whole endeavor, the Zeltron had set the controls of the chair to something that vibrated pleasantly against the muscles of his back, which was not a totally unwelcome feeling, either.

"It's included in the package," she said, gesturing to the rainbow of tiny bottles in a display next to them. "Any color you like. I think I could even match your armor."

Following this, the Zeltron gave him a look that was, he supposed, meant to incite a man to all sorts of impure thoughts; it was a bright, beaming smile that accompanied her straightening back, which only served to highlight the – he had to admit – impressive swell of her rose-colored chest.

He expected her to deflate when he did not return her smile, but instead she gave him a knowing look and bent down to set the nail-file away with the rest of her tools, affording him a rather pleasant view for a man who'd been used to being surrounded by nothing but brothers. But he was Commander-kriffing-Wolffe, for Force's sake, and her charms – significant though they might be – would _not_ work on him.

No crinking way.

So he took a deep breath and shook his head. "No polish."

"As you like," she replied lightly, bending once more to pick up his right foot; she selected a steaming washcloth from a small container beside her and placed it across his shin, pressing her hands down as if to force his skin to soak up the heat. "Now, try to relax, okay?"

Well, _shab_, that felt pretty good...then the towel slid away and he watched as she pulled a small bottle of something pale and creamy from the cart beside her.

_Fierfek, _was it so hard to _listen_?

"I said _no_ polish," he said with a sigh. Honestly, this woman was worse than a damn shiny. "What part of-"

"It's just lotion," she replied, laughing. "Totally harmless, see?" To illustrate, she squirted a dollop of it on her hand and began rubbing the pale substance along her arm, where it contrasted nicely with her rosy skin. When he did not object further, she squirted out another measure in her palms and began rubbing them together, presumably to work up friction and heat.

As she did so, Wolffe's nose wrinkled. "What's that smell? Is that namana?"

She did not answer. Instead, she placed both hands on his right leg and began to rub.

Hard.

The sudden pressure made his breath catch; she was stronger than she looked, and he'd been caught off-guard at the sensation of her hands on his leg, but he only allowed himself the feeling for an instant. She seemed not to notice his moment of surprise, instead kneading against the muscle of his calf with an expert touch. The lotion allowed her skin to glide over his easily, and coupled with the mechanical but pleasant rolling motions the chair was making against his back and the jets of water that were washing across his left foot as it rested in the basin, Wolffe felt his body relaxing more and more with each minute.

"Lean back, please," she said, and no one was more surprised than Wolffe when he complied without hesitation. When he did, she picked up his foot with both hands and rested his heel in her lap; part of his brain registered that his toes were perilously close to her breasts, but before he could object, she ran her thumbs along the arch of his foot, and his eyes closed.

Along with the arch, his heel was rubbed and kneaded, as was his ankle. Each toe was languished over with the sweet-smelling lotion that he _knew _he'd have to wash off...but later, perhaps. Once she was finished, she set his right foot back in the basin, then carefully picked up his left, giving it the same treatment with the towel, the lotion, and the rubbing.

Each minute that ticked by got better and better, and he forgot to think about how annoying all of this was, because really, it wasn't so bad to have a pretty woman treating him like this...

When each foot had been massaged individually, he felt her bring both of them up to the padded footrest at the end of the basin, and she began the process again: a steaming hot towel on his legs, followed by lotion and a sweeping rub on his calves and shins.

Maybe the entire thing took an hour, as it was supposed to. Maybe it only took ten minutes. By the end of it, Wolffe had no kriffing idea how much time had passed, but he did not find the idea as alarming as he perhaps should have.

In fact, what alarmed him the most was when her touch lifted from his legs; its absence was what caused his eyes to open and blink at her.

"All done." Her voice was as bright as her smile. For a moment he said nothing, then he swallowed and managed to collect his thoughts enough to form a reply. "Thanks...er-"

"Ava," she said with a nod.

"Ava." He nodded back, then glanced at the chrono on the wall. "Wait a minute...this was supposed to last an hour."

She bent to collect the washcloths she'd used, her dark, violet hair spilling down across her shoulder. "That's true."

Wolffe scowled again. "Are you trying to short me?"

"The hour includes a toenail polish," she replied with a shrug as she tossed the used washcloths in another bin. "Since you opted to decline my services in that area..." She paused and gave him a curious look that was, he thought, a little bit devious. "You're still declining, right?"

"Right."

She nodded as well, then sighed and rested her chin on her hand, her gaze flickering to the array of polish bottles that were lined up so neatly along the wall. "It's too bad," she said, still not looking at him. "That one would go perfectly with your eye."

It was perhaps one of the oddest things he'd ever heard, and he couldn't _not _reply. "I thought you wanted to match the armor?"

Ava shrugged. "I changed my mind. Besides," she added, and he watched as spots of darker pink appeared in her cheeks. "Your eye is...well. Never mind."

She moved like she was going to stand up, but he was beyond curious, now, and still rather relaxed from the whole ordeal, so he cleared his throat, causing her to glance his way again. "What about my eye?"

"It's...unique," she said, meeting his gaze. "Sexy. And I love the color silver. Very distinguished."

Wolffe studied her for a moment. "You have silver polish?"

Violet eyes lit up with excitement, but he could see that she was trying to remain casual. Rather than answer right away, she stood up, selected a bottle from the rows and brought it back to him for his inspection. "See? It's a perfect match."

So it was. He'd spent enough hours staring at his cybernetic implant to see that was the case. Another glance at Ava showed him that she was nearly quivering with excitement, though she was doing a fair job keeping her expression neutral, and the thought crossed his mind that there were worse things in life than meeting a beautiful Zeltron woman who thought his implant was _sexy. _

Finally he sighed and nodded, then leaned back in the chair. "Okay, Ava. Polish away."

Her smile was wide. "But you said 'no polish.'"

Wolffe did not smile back, but he was pretty damn close to it. "I changed my mind."


	5. Kix Takes a Bath by Queen

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Kix Takes a Bath

* * *

(_by: Queen_)

* * *

Surveillance. Not too difficult. Except for the part where he didn't know where to go.

Kix stood at the end of the hallway, facing a desk, with two curtains behind it, one in blue, one in red, and each curtain had a different symbol on it. He suspected one side was for the men, and other for the women, but he wasn't exactly sure which was which. Just as he was about to comm the Captain for advice, a woman appeared from behind the red curtain, her arms filled with folded towels. Spotting him, she froze, then smiled as she plopped the towels down on the desk.

"Hello! I'm Ami. Can I help you?" she asked brightly.

He looked at the two curtains. "Uh, yes. I'd like to…" was this really his assignment? "I'd like to take a bath."

"Of course," Ami said cheerfully, pulling a towel off her stack and then a robe out from a drawer under the desk. Noticing his hesitation as she handed him the towel and robe, she added, "First time? It's not hard. Blue is the men's side. Pick a locker and stow your things in there. Shower first, then soak in one of the springs. You can take the towel with you, but the robe is for lounging after." Ami gave him a very mild frown and warned, "And don't think about sneaking into the women's side. Tharra is very protective and doesn't like security breaches." The frown switched back to a friendly smile and chirrupy voice. "But other than that, please enjoy your stay!"

Kix nodded and accepted the towel and robe, edging to the left and pushing his way past the blue curtain. He wasn't sure he wanted to meet Tharra, whoever she was. Security for the women, probably. Maybe they had a peeping problem here?

A wide hallway filled with plants gave way to a locker room with a forest theme, and he changed quickly, wrapping the white towel around his waist. The other men wandering through the locker area seemed to not even be bothering with that much modesty, or were already in their robes and wandering out into the general spa area.

Following Ami's directions, Kix wandered into the shower area first. Piping hot steam rolled through the room and puddles of warm water splashed under his bare feet. Each stall was only waist height, and he snuck a surreptitious look towards some of the other men to figure out what to do. There was a stool in front of the showerhead, and dispensers labeled SOAP and SHAMPOO on either side of a faucet. Mimicking the other men and remembering the advice, he tossed his towel over the side of the shower and sat on the stool, showering first, using a small bucket to dump water on himself when the showerhead seemed too low.

Feeling clean and warm, he scooped up his towel and wandered across the bathing area. Everyone looked like they were concentrating on washing themselves or relaxing in the steaming water. Nothing seemed suspicious, but he'd need to stay for a while, just to make sure.

Heading out into an enclosed, outdoor area, he found several pools, each with a couple other men soaking in the water. He shivered a bit – the air was chilly, making the steaming water particularly appealing. From beyond the wooden fence, he could hear the occasional sound of voices, higher and more feminine, and realized the women's hot spring was just on the other side of a dividing fence. He grinned to himself. He'd have been in a lot of trouble if he'd wandered in over there, though that certainly would have been a sight to see.

This area though was peacefully decorated, imitating a series of caves. Tropical plants dripped off the rocky backdrop of the outdoor bathhouse, and purple flowers hung overhead on an arbor.

The water looked a little weird, with each pool a different color. Some were clear and full of carbonated bubbles, others were a strange brown color, and others were a golden hue. The largest one was an oblong golden one, and Kix paused by the steps leading into it, reading the plaque posted beside the railing. "Good for arthritis, muscle problems, joint pain, eczema, hypertension, peripheral arterial obliterative disease, functional arterial circulation disorder, functional cardiac disease…" the list went on, and Kix's eyebrows raised. If it were true, a good soak in that water would be miraculous. The treatments that could be devised….

He eyed it again. It was an odd color, but according to the plaque, it was due to sulfuric content. The steam did smell a bit like sulfur, but not in an overpowering way. Well, he was a medic. If the hot spring was claiming to be such a curative, he really should test it out. For the sake of future patients.

Stepping into the water, he set his towel aside again to keep it from getting wet. The water was incredibly hot, and he began to flush as his ankles were submerged, then knees, waist, chest. Steam streamed up around his face, and he realized that there was a bench running along the edge of the pool as he stumbled further in. Sitting down, he tilted his head back against the rocky ledge and looked upward at a blue sky.

He couldn't remember the last time he felt so gloriously warm. The piping hot water of the outdoor spring was a perfect contrast to the chill of the air against his skin, and he sighed contentedly as the hot water began to relax his muscles, seeping deep into his bones. A little at a time, down his neck, back, shoulders, arms, he eased into the water, letting himself almost float.

If this was a trap, he was going to die a happy, warm, and relaxed man.


	6. Hardcase Finds the Wrong Room, by Queen

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Hardcase Finds the Wrong Room

(_by: Queen_)

* * *

Kix had been gone way too long.

Actually, just about everyone was disappearing, but he was supposed to be helping cover the bathing area surveillance, Kix had disappeared, and wasn't answering his comm. So Hardcase stomped his way down to the hot springs area, trying to ignore the soothing music constantly played over the spa's intercom, in order to find his brother, who may or may not have gone missing.

When he arrived, he found himself looking at a desk placed in front of two sets of curtains, one blue and one red, each marked with a symbol on the front that he unfortunately couldn't read. There was a sign sitting on the front of the desk announcing "Back in a Moment!" with a cute little mooka underneath it, waving a paw.

Drawing a hand blaster, Hardcase headed towards the right and ducked behind the red curtain, intending on either pulling Kix out of the bath, or shooting whatever it was that had captured him.

Unfortunately, after running down a plant-filled hallway, what he found was not Kix, or a spy, but instead a locker room full of mostly naked women of various species, all staring at him. He'd never actually seen a naked woman before, so despite standing in the doorway with a handblaster drawn, he took a moment to gape back at them.

A Zeltron woman tilted her head to the side and lifted an eyebrow as she fastened her bra back on, her gaze trailing down over his shirt and the form fitting blue pants they'd all been instructed was popular 'civilian clothing', before drifting back upwards. Hardcase couldn't help but grin in response. Her expression was clearly approving, and she was also only wearing underwear. Then she said, lazily, "You know, the rest of them are going to start screaming in a second."

Hardcase had just enough time to blink before an older human woman with what appeared to be her teenage daughter began to do just that. The daughter joined her a second later, and several more women began shrieking from around the locker room, pelting him with whatever was at hand – mostly a combination of wet towels and shoes.

That was when he realized there was a very angry female Wookiee charging him, and Hardcase spun, running back for the entrance and bowling over a woman carrying a stack of dry, folded towels. As he tripped over the bath attendant and toppled to the ground, white towels went flying everywhere, and the Wookiee ripped one of them apart as she roared at Hardcase.

A familiar voice cut through the screaming and the roaring. "What the – Hardcase?"

Scrambling to his feet, Hardcase saw Kix, wearing a lounge robe, standing beside the front desk with his civvies under his arm. There wasn't any time to say anything else, as the wet furred Wookiee plucked him off the ground and snarled something that was probably extremely unflattering at him in Shyriiwook, and then proceeded to try ripping his arms out of his sockets.

Hardcase twisted, lifting his legs and planting them on her chest, then pushed. It was just enough, and he went tumbling out of the enraged Wookiee's reach.

There were several other women piling out of the red-curtained entrance now, either in robes or wrapped in white towels. They looked like they had raided a custodial closet, and were bristling with brooms and mops, along with sharp-heeled shoes. One Twi'lek appeared to be wielding a particularly large potted plant. The Twi'lek turned her head, spotted Kix, and shouted, "There's TWO of them!"

The Wookiee flung her arms upward and roared again, and Kix said, a little exasperated, "Ah, you must be Tharra," before shouting at Hardcase, "Run!"

The two clones bolted, and the angry women surged after, screaming in outrage.


	7. Body Scrub, by SerendipityAEY

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Body Scrub

(_by: SerendipityAEY_)

* * *

_Infiltrate. Obtain information. And get the frak out. _

Whisky sighed as he approached the nondescript building at the edge of the city. A spa.

Blending in as a civilian was nothing new to him, but he wasn't sure about this _'being pamper_ed' thing... Sounded like a ridiculous waste of time to him.

If he had it his way he was sure he could find someone to press up against a wall instead - _how_he pressed them to the wall depended on whether the subject was male or female. Always a productive way to obtain information, but - orders were orders. And they'd come straight from the top.

_Be inconspicuous._

So here he was. A normal guy, going for a spa day. Right.

Just before he opened the door, Whisky smoothed his hands over the black fabric of his trousers, tight across his hips and he caught sight of himself in the reflection of the glass. Straightening his button down tunic, he adopted a relaxed, casual expression and stepped inside.

As soon as he entered, he was greeted by a bright-eyed blonde, all bubbles and smiles. "Welcome to our spa!" she greeted him cheerily. "No better place in the galaxy to get fluffed and buffed! Do you have an appointment?"

Whisky faltered for one moment, overwhelmed by her exuberance. "Uh - no. I -"

"No problem! We always accept walk-ins. Let me see what we have available right now... Mr...?" Her gaze had shifted down, her finger skimming over a large screen set in the counter.

"Corran Whisky." His answer was automatic, the name _'Corran'_one he had used for some time.

Grinning, she looked up from her schedule. "Mr. Whisky," she repeated, giggling. Then she tilted her head as she regarded him. "Hey... do you have a brother?"

Sighing inwardly, Whisky resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Yes, I do. Is anything open?"

"Oh, umm... We have a fabulous sea-salt body scrub, or a facial and waxing package – "

"The body scrub," he interrupted. _That doesn't sound too bad..._

"Great! Go ahead down the hallway to room number two, second door on the right. Enjoy!"

The hallway was bright and clean, the room easy to find. Upon entering, he found a short brunette, her hair pulled into a plait that fell across her shoulder. She turned as he entered, casting him a soft smile.

"Body scrub?" she asked.

Whisky nodded, flashing her his best smile, which she returned. The room had a large table in the center, obviously meant for someone to lay across. The floor was tiled and there was a metal arm with multiple shower heads that stretched parallel above the table.

It was clear it was meant to be a_ full _body scrub, and under the hands of the pretty brunette, Whisky found himself looking forward to it.

"Here's a couple towels," she smiled. "Go ahead and take your tunic and trousers off. I'll get some extra towels and return in a few minutes."

As soon as she left, Whisky set the towels aside and took his clothes off. Honestly, he wasn't entirely sure what else he was supposed to do at this point, so he stood, hands on hips, while he waited for her return.

It was only a moment before the door opened again. As she entered, her eyes took in his completely nude form, top to bottom, and she stopped just inside the room. Her mouth opened, then closed again, and she blinked. "I didn't mean - um, actually..." she gestured toward where he set the stack of towels. "We provide disposable underwear - "

Looking to the counter he noticed what he hadn't before. _Oh well, no point now._A wide grin spread across his face as he turned back to her. "That's alright. As long as you don't mind, that is."

"Ah, no... not at all." She seemed to compose herself, and he noticed with a bit of regret that he hadn't made her blush at all.

"Go ahead and lie down on the table - _face down_- and we can get started."

He did as she asked, happy the table was much more comfortable than it looked. After a moment, he felt her lay a towel across his seat and then her hands were at his shoulders.

The grainy substance was coarse, but smoothed easily beneath her touch and it felt incredible on his skin. Her hands administered just the right amount of pressure and he felt a deep sigh escape as his whole body began to relax under her attentive ministrations, so much so he almost forgot his objective.

_Mission, _he reminded himself. _You're not actually here for a spa treatment, di'kut._

"So, uhh..." He had to pause to clear his throat, as it came out a little hoarse. "How do you like working here?"

"It's alright, I suppose. It pays the bills."

Her hands were moving across his back now, scrubbing the little granules over his skin and it took most his will power to concentrate on her answer.

"Do you like your boss?" he asked.

A disapproving noise came before she answered. "He's a jerk," she muttered, then paused. "I mean - "

"Don't worry," he chuckled. "I won't tell. Not a good guy?"

"There's something not right... I don't know. It's not my place."

"Does he ever come in?"

"Only on the first day of the week. I try to stay out of his way."

Her hands hand moved down now, to the lowest part of his back, and he was finding it increasingly hard to stay still. At least he'd gotten _some_information... Any longer and he had a feeling he wouldn't be able to think at all...

"Let me know if it's too hard," she spoke up after a moment, and Whisky almost choked.

"Uh, no... It's great." _Nope, probably not getting any more information._

"As soon as we're done with this, we'll shower you off and then I'll get the oil," she added.

_Oil..._

His eyes closed, all he could think about was the feel of her fingers on his skin. The roughness of the scrub felt incredible, but _oil_?

No, he definitely would not be gathering any more intel.


	8. Honey, by JustHanginWithTheClones

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Honey

(by: JustHanginWithTheClones)

* * *

Captain Rex entered the Massage therapy part of the Spa. He knew his objective; collect as much intel on the suspected Seperatist spy that they believed was running the Spa as a cover up for his actual assignments.

Rex scanned the open reception area. The walls were white, with the occasional framed image breaking the monotonous sheen that seemed to reflect off the walls.

It reminded Rex of a 'shinies' armour.

The clone Captain's thoughts were broken by a young, blonde woman, "Hello sir! Can I help you today? I'm Evie." She smiled warmly

Rex was rather taken aback by the young woman's eagerness, "uh...yes, ma'am, I'm looking for -"

"A massage?" Evie burst out brightly

"A what?"

"A massage? Would you like one?"

"Sorry, I don't follow -"

"How about our special for today? Honey?"

Rex had heard of 'honey' before, a sweet, sticky substance, that -apparently- tasted amazing on sweets and desserts. He also heard that they were eaten with fruit, especially ossberries.

"Sir?"

Rex realised he hadn't answered her question. In a rush to be polite, he answered,

"Yes."

"Okay sir, if you head into the waiting room just over there " she pointed "I'll come and sort you out in a moment."

"Thank you." Rex replied, and went in the direction Evie had pointed.

He didn't see the gleaming smile on her face.

* * *

Sitting down on a chair he presumed was made of Greel. The Spa itself had a spacious feel, a place of indulgence and luxury for civilians, and Rex found himself feeling a little out of place. The Spa gave an impression of being clean, and pure, in a way that rex wasn't used to. With his scuffed, battle hardened armour, his battle honours...

"Sir?"

Rex looked up to see Evie, smiling radiantly at him.

"Yes?"

"Your massage? If you'll follow me..."

Rex looked around the waiting room, took a breath and got up, following Evie through the doorway.

* * *

"Just sit back" Evie spoke calmly, even though she was absolutely squirming inside.

She was less that 2 foot away from the hottest guy she'd ever seen.

And she was about to give_ him_ a massage. _Her_, to give _him_ a massage.

How she didn't just leap on him and rip his clothes off there and then she'd never know.

He lay down on his chest, closing his eyes. Evie looked down at her hands, realising she was shaking. She clasped the bottle of honey, squeezing a little out into her shaky palm.

She was going to _touch _him. Massage him...hopefully he'd enjoy it enough for a second appointment.

Evie felt like slapping herself.

* * *

Rex waited, wondering what was going to happen. He'd never had a 'massage' before, and to be truthful he hadn't a clue what a 'massage' actually was.

He took a deep breath, and forced himself to relax.

Although, he felt for the blaster he had hidden under his chest.

_Still there. That's good, just in case I need it._ He thought to himself, re-adjusting its position so that it pointed towards the door incase of an 'emergency'.

What kind of 'emergency' he was expecting though, Rex had no idea.

* * *

Evie giggled "you'll have to take your suit off, sir"

"Oh, sorry." Rex replied quickly, sitting up and unzipping the front of his body suit, shrugging off the shoulders, and down to his waist.

Rex suddenly felt exposed and...well, odd.

"Don't worry, you don't have to take the rest off" Evie replied, although she was thinking *exactly* the opposite.

Rex laid back down, replacing his blaster in the same position, pointing towards the door.

That's when the odd, but slightly relaxing, feeling started. Rex felt something thick and warm on his back, and then a pair of hands, slowly working in small circles across his shoulders, the back of his neck, down to his waist, then back up.

Rex started to feel himself relaxing, maybe he'd enjoy this after all.

* * *

After at least 10 minutes of massaging, Evie realised he'd drifted off. She froze, wondering if she should wake him, or continue?

Evie decided on the latter. She presumed he'd wake up eventually, anyway. With a smile, she continued rubbing in the honey, which had now filled the room with a sweet, pleasant smell.

But to her dismay, the young masseuse found that she had rubbed in all the honey all too quickly. She _very_ carefully removed her hands - knowing that this _could_ have the potential to hurt him..._a lot_.

After carefully taking her hands off his back, and washing them in the small sink in the corner of the room, she found he was still asleep.

So, Evie decided to carry on massaging. She didn't bother with the honey this time, and instead dipped her hands in some warm massage oil, before slowly rubbing it into his neck, and the base of his head.

She could feel all the tight muscles in his neck slowly relax, so she started to work her way along his left arm, gently massaging his muscled biceps, down to his forearm, and then his palm. She softly massaged the warm aromatic oil into his wrist, taking the time to gaze at his exotic face.

Evie had _dreamed_ of guys like him.

And she knew she'd never stand even the slightest little chance with him.

Snapping herself out of depressing thoughts, she worked her way back up his arm, moving along his shoulders, and down to the top of his right arm.

She crouched down by his side, and noticed that his arm was tucked under his chest, so Evie gently and carefully reached under, and felt for his hand.

She touched something cold.

That's strange. "Hmm..." She said aloud.

Holding his hand, she slowly pulled his forearm from underneath his broad, tanned, muscled chest.

He stirred.

Evie gasped, and quickly covered her mouth with her hand.

He was looking _right_ at her.

Her deep, sapphire coloured eyes widened. "I'm so sorry, I -"

Rex smirked, and lifted his head, "Don't worry, ma'am."

"You can call me Evie." She replied, sounding slightly squeaky. "Sorry, I never asked your name?"

"I'm Captain Rex."

A _Captain_?! Oh, this day just got_ better_ and _better._

"Uh, " Evie became aware of where her hand was. Still underneath his chest, and his fingers intertwined with hers. She mentally slapped herself; "Uh, do you want to go? Your session finished nearly twenty minutes ago..."

"Right." Rex seemed to snap to it, and pushed himself up, letting Evie pull her hand away.

She sighed sadly, watching him dress.

"Sorry ma'- Evie, have I offended you?" Rex asked, genuine concern in his eyes

Evie made an effort to smile, "no, no - not at all, Rex."

She saw the gun that had been underneath him, and chuckled, causing Rex to turn around;

"Sorry?"

"Did you...have that, gun, underneath you the _whole_ time?" Evie giggled

"Yeah..." Rex allowed himself to grin, and turned fully, to show her a small imprint of his blaster on his front.

Although, Evie wasn't _really_ looking at the mark...

_Those muscles_...

Evie was melting, surely, either that or she had died and gone to heaven, although this was a bittersweet moment.

A guy she'd love forever, and never know.

* * *

Before too long, Rex was fully armoured up. Evie held his helmet out for him to take, which as he did, his fingers brushed lightly against hers.

She met his gaze, and blushed, battering her thick eyelashes a couple of times.

Rex felt an odd feeling in his stomach.

_Kriff. What was wrong with him today?_

He nodded thanks, and went to the door.

"Urm...Rex?" Evie asked, walking over to him

"Yes, Evie?" Rex turned, and smiled

Their eyes locked for a second time, and Evie closed the gap between them instantly, pulling his lips to hers.

The initial shock of what was happening, then the realisation, hit Rex like a brick wall.

_She's a good kisser _he thought to himself, _frak Rex, you don't even know what a 'good kisser' is!_

It was true, Rex had never been kissed before.

But, the Captain let the kiss continue, savouring the smell of honey and the taste of her lipstick.

Too soon however, the moment ended, and Evie stepped back shyly; "goodbye, Rex" she smiled

"Bye Evie." Rex smiled once more, nodding his head slowly. He then turned and left, closing the door softly behind him.

He had some _good_ intel for the guys.

* * *

_Some weeks later..._

"Evie! Someone's here to see ya!" called the receptionist.

Evie put down her mug of honey-tea, and sighed, getting up to go to the reception.

She almost passed out.

"I've come for another appointment with your masseuse, Evie."

"Your name?" The receptionist asked.

"Rex. Captain Rex."

* * *

_A/N : I really hope you enjoyed this story! Thank you for reading! X JHWTC_


	9. Chopper at the Spa, by reulte

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Chopper at the Spa

(_by: reulte_)

* * *

"A spa." Chopper's voice was unnaturally flat.

"Strictly a voluntary mission," said Fives. "Rooting out seppies spies isn't really GAR jurisdiction, but this spa caters to clones."

"It'll be fun," enthused Echo, "getting massages, having calluses smoothed out, just a bit of pampering and relaxing afterward in a hot tub."

Chopper flinched.

Fives sighed and Echo bowed his head in regret. "You don't have to go just because Boomer is a di'kut."

He wouldn't have gone except for Boomer's accusation that he wouldn't go because he had Seppie sympathies; after all that had happened on Christophsis. Not that Boomer knew everything. There was simply too much doubt and room for rumor. Boomer hadn't finished his sentence before Chopper had stepped forward with the rest of the volunteers – all far more eager than him. He'd been proud to be called into the meeting and seen Rex's best men, knowing the captain included him in that elite group. Until he heard the mission.

* * *

He disrobed in a small anteroom. The towel they'd given him was barely large enough to cover his… well, barely large enough. He could have rear dignity or frontal coverage but not both.

She had strong fingers that dug into his body, but she was a civilian and a woman and someone unknown and every time she touched his skin, Chopper flinched and his muscles tightened, defeating the entire purpose of the massage.

She took a step back and Chopper let go of a heavy sigh as he push up from the table and sat his legs dangling and that small towel that covered so little on his lap. "I guess I'm not…" he began but she waved a hand then lifted it to her chin. Her face was deep in thought.

"You don't like being touched." she began slowly, "I think I know what you would like best." She gave a determined nod. "It will sting at first but after a short while the endorphins kick in and you'll relax."

Chopper gave an accepting tilt of his head. He didn't believe her, but it was worth a try.

* * *

Fives and Echo waited somewhat anxiously for Chopper, Echo chewing on the edge of his thumb.

"Stop that, Echo," said Fives as he looked toward the door, "or you'll ruin your Manly Mani."

Echo dropped his hand to his side. "You don't think," he began but saw Chopper leaving at that moment.

Chopper came out with a look of relaxed satisfaction and his skin, roped with scars, looked smoother, somehow softer. He looked pink; not scarred pink but new pink like one of the younger cadets who'd been running, fresh and healthy pink. His skin seemed almost shiny, like he'd been buffed and polished.

He saw them and lifted an eyebrow; rather he would have lifted an eyebrow if they hadn't been gone. "She got a little carried away when the Wookiee chased Kix and Hardcase through the room," explained Chopper with the small curl of a grin at the corner of his lips as he touched above one eye with a finger. "They'll grow back."

"What treatment did you get?"

"Full body waxing."


	10. Epilogue, by reulte

_A Spa Story_

* * *

Epilogue

(_by: reulte_)

* * *

Nerys sighed with a smile as she closed out the day's receipts. It was slightly better than average but the appointment rate had gone through the roof. She decided they really should comp Arle's next appointment for her inspiration of sending out the vid of Mr. Delectable tackling the reptile on open HoloNet. She'd never liked the Trandoshan; he was always coming around and bothering her fingernail girls (exactly what was it with Trandoshans and fingernails anyway?), but the manager had always brushed aside her concerns. She'd been glad (and delightfully entertained) when the tall, blonde man – obviously some kind of security agent with muscles and reactions like that – had taken the big lizard down.

Now she knew why her manager had been unconcerned. Seppie traitor!

At least he was gone now as well, taken away by two of those lovely men, the one in nothing more than the spa's robe that didn't fully stretch to cover his magnificent chest who had turned his head and given her a long, flirtatious wink. Ava had had caught him, and his delicious wink, on her personal vid.

Nerys had already proposed a new managing team. Consensus-style, each full-timer having a full vote and part-timers with a half vote. Their first meeting would begin in a few minutes.

* * *

"We're fully booked for the next six months," Nerys said, going over her notes of their meeting for a recap, "and I think we can all thank Mr. Delectable for that; Arle's next mani-pedi will be free. That Holovid going viral means we can minimize advertising expenses for a few months, increasing our profits and, finally, being able to fix that sputtering output in the sauna." She nodded toward Ava who blushed even deeper than her normal Zeltron rose. Nerys supposed it was because she had a few seconds of her TD&EH (tall, dark and exceedingly handsome) posing with very little more than the silver polish and cybernetic implant. Nerys had only caught a glimpse before Ava had smiled and closed her vid. Ah well, you couldn't really sneak around Zeltrons.

"We'll keep Ava's vid of the arrest private and release it in three months; in advance of the holidays." Around the room there were nods of agreement. Nerys shuffled the flimsi, turning to the next page. "Tharra will be receiving a medal of appreciation from the Chancellor himself for her assistance in the capture of a Separatist spy," Nerys bowed her head in respect to the big Wookiee who hooted softly.

Ami muttered softly, "I'd much rather get a metal from one of the delicious men." There were a couple of nods and forlorn sighs.

The way Nerys had heard the tale one of these lovely, muscular men had seen the door ajar and they had both slipped into the room, thinking to hide there, catching the manager on a direct-feed, encrypted holovid to Count Dooku himself.

"Well," said Bekti, "talking about spies and Mr. D must have been one." She glanced around with her wide blue eyes. "You know, like the Holonet entertainment. Like Bames Jond. So maybe in about four months we can start a rumor that … maybe.., you know." She shrugged perkily and sat in her chair. "And they'll come back."

Tedye, the bathing attendant, sighed dramatically, fanning his red face with his palm. Nerys ignored him, he did most things dramatically.

Nerys looked at her, oblivious as usual to her fractured speaking pattern. She glanced at another of the fingernail girls. Lark was nodding. "Rumors of spies," she grinned.


End file.
